We shall meet again
by EndlessGhostfire
Summary: When your soul mate dies, your world turns black and white. Merlin has resigned himself to it, but all is about to change. Kind of AU. Modern reincarnation. Rated T for the time being. Caution: some angst and minor swearing
1. Chapter 1

**Hello my beautiful people, before you start reading I just want to say a few things. My last Merlin (merthur) fanfic was a huge success and I am so grateful to all of you who have read it and supported me! Seeing as I haven't done anything for ages, I decided to get my author on and just sit and write. The first thing that came into my head was this prompt I've been loving for ages that says:**

**Everyone has a soul mate, when your soul mate dies, everything turns black and white. You however were born into a world of black and white until one day you wake up and the world is in colour.**

**Now, I decided to be a bit naughty and change it slightly to fit what I had in mind.**

_**This is just an experiment! **_**I don't know whether it is good or not I just sat down and wrote what I've been wanting to for ages. So, here is my question to you:**

**Do you like it? Should I continue this? Would you like to see more? Leave a comment!**

**Disclaimer: All respective characters rightfully belong to Merlin BBC**

Getting out of bed every day to grey covers and grey walls gets tiring after a while. Although after 1000 years you get used to it. How I envy the people I pass in the street, marvelling at the wondrous colours that filled a photo frame, or arguing whether a piece of clothing was lilac or mauve. I missed it; not being able to see the bright blue of the sky, or the deep green of someone's eyes. Everything was just grey.

It wasn't always like this. I used to be able to marvel at the colours in a photo frame like other people. I used to be able to see the gorgeous blue of someone's eyes as they looked at me, be able to look into someone's eyes and be able to see their souls.

You see, this world revolves around soul mates. The only person that was meant to be the other side of your coin. Many people made it their lives ambition to find them.

There was one catch, however; one thing that Fate decided would be a good thing. It wasn't. I have seen people waste away because of this catch, not being able to be near their soul mate, because they were in the next world. I have watched as they despair at their sudden inability to see colour. For when your soul mate dies, your whole world turns black and white.

Those people who lost their colour, as the phrase goes, usually last about a year, trying to survive in the world after half of their soul had been ripped from them.

Mine was ripped from me, in the worst possible way. It was many lifetimes ago, and yet I can still vividly see it in my mind whenever I close my eyes. Their once bright eyes slowly losing their light, until all I could see were grey orbs of a dead man. The flames that rose from their boat almost seemed unreal, those white flicks in the middle of a dull grey lake.

That was 1000 years ago, and yet here I am.

Thoughts like this cloud my mind every day, every second they are running through my head like a never ending river. I have tried to shake them off before, but they come back tenfold, blinding me of visions of bright capes, light hair waving in the wind and flashes of their last moments.

I couldn't stay where I was, not after he left me. I ran. And ran. Until my feet bled and I couldn't breathe. Even then I still kept on, lost in my own mind's torture where I could not escape.

Many moments after that are lost to me, as they happened so long ago and I was so broken with grief.

I got used to the black and white world around me and, after years of searching, I finally found somewhere that calmed me. It wasn't home. The feeling of home was viciously ripped from me by the hands of Fate. I fought in wars, helped other people overcome plague, saved people from torture, but could never save myself.

After all this time I am still not saved. I don't think I will ever be. Fate is cruel, and does not like to be challenged. I tried, many times, to bring my soul mate back to me, but every time Fate denied me.

I found a place to settle down, after years of endless wondering; the place where he was ripped from me. It was somehow the same, even though the landscape around it had changed dramatically. Maybe the spirits felt pity for me and kept the lake untouched. I bought a tiny cottage that over looked the place, with no neighbours, just wildlife around me. I liked it. I felt closer to the Earth that way.

I got a job, as a barista in a small coffee shop in the next village to me. I haven't gotten close to anyone in the time I've been there, I wouldn't dare. I've had far too much heartbreak to get close to anyone ever again.

Looking at the clock on my shabby bedside table, I realised that my overpowering thoughts made me late. I rushed around my dark bedroom, falling over my own feet as I try and stick my leg through my trouser hole. I donned my dark work tee and grabbed a hoodie. Clothing in this modern age was one of the only things I appreciated, it was much comfier than anything before the 1960s. Walking into the still kitchen, I grabbed my keys from the bowl by the door and lock up. Glancing back as I walk towards the road, I thought just how small my house was. I didn't mind it, I was the only one who lived there, and it was fine for me. I shrugged on my hoodie and shoved my keys in the pocket, beginning my short walk to the coffee shop. As I trudged down the street, I overheard two middle aged mothers chatting.

"It's so grey and overcast today, nothing like yesterday"

I found this amusing. Lucky for some, I thought. Looking up, the sky was just as grey as the day before, but with more clouds. I shook my head and carried on my way, trying to ignore everyone else.

The bell on the door chimed loudly as I stepped through the door, pulling my hood down and shaking my hair out. It was getting long, almost touching my shoulders. I was told by my co-workers that I suited it, though, so I decided to keep it.

I made a bee-line towards the back of the shop, hanging my hoodie up on a hook and grabbing an apron.

Kate was already behind the counter, and gave me a smile as I walked back through to the front of the shop. She was nice, and had helped me a lot when I started working there. I got on well with her, but would always turn down her invitations to go for a drink afterwards, I didn't want to get too close to her. She looked a couple of years older than my physical form, but I didn't know her actual age, I never bothered to ask. She had dark hair, I guessed it was brown, but wasn't certain, which was always pulled up in a messy ponytail with pieces falling around her head. Somehow, she always looked beautiful, even after a 10 hour shift. She was shorter than me, although typically taller than most women and a healthy weight. Most girls envied her for the confident way she held herself, always with her head high. She stopped sweeping the floor and turned to me, just as I realised I had drifted off.

"Head in the clouds again, eh, Merlin?" She said with a cheeky smile and nudged me with her elbow so she could sweep where I was standing.

I gave her a smile and went to the till, "Sorry" I replied, which made her chuckle.

"After a few years I'm used to it, sweetie, you're always doing it. You know you can tell me whatever you keep thinking about?"

I glanced sideways at her and shook my head, "It's a very long story"

"Well I've known you for two years and hardly know a thing about you except your eyes are exceptionally gorgeous"

I chuckled, Kate always had a way of cheering me up, even if it was only for a few minutes.

"Does Rupert know you always flirt with me?" I raised an eyebrow at her as the bell signalled a customer. I gave them a wide smile as they entered and took a seat, trying to decide on the type of coffee they wanted.

Kate scoffed, "He doesn't care if I flirt with you, sweetie, he only gets jealous if the flirtee is a threat"

I pretended to be offended, "What do you mean? That I'm not a threat?"

She laughed, her curls bouncing around her face, "Of course you're not. I've never even see you look at someone with interest"

My smile faded and I turned back to the till. Kate knew she hit a sore spot but was stopped from saying anything when the customers advanced to the till.

I greeted them happily and got their orders, firing up the coffee machine as they took their seats again.

"Look, Merlin, I'm sorry" I heard Kate's guilty voice behind me.

I shook my head and gave her a look over my shoulder as I made the coffee, my hands moving on their own accord, it was almost muscle memory now. "It's fine, seriously."

"No it's not"

"Yes it is."

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kate sidle up to my side, trying to show me just how sorry she was.

"It's really not. Did something happen? I didn't know"

Flashes of his smiling eyes clouded my vision for a second. "It was a long time ago" I muttered, placing the two freshly made coffees on a tray. "It doesn't matter anymore, can we change the subject please?" I said quickly before walking over to the customers' table to give them their orders. When I returned to the counter, Kate had gone back to sweeping, a guilty look still on her face. I decided to change the subject.

"How was your weekend? You said you were going to the beach with your family?"

Kate sighed dramatically, and I chuckled at just how much of a drama queen she could be sometimes, especially when it came to her family.

"Don't get me started on my bloody weekend" She growled, her sweeping becoming almost violent, "It was shit. No wonder my family never gets together"

I listened as she ranted, happy to take my mind of things for a bit, even if it was how Kate's brother got attacked by a seagull.

An hour into my shift and there had only been five customers. I had taken out my sketchpad from under the counter and was sketching when Kate came back in from her break, smelling of the last cigarette she's smoked.

"You stink" I said offhandedly, not taking my eyes from my book. I felt a hand slap my arm. "Hey!" I exclaimed, rubbing my arm and turned to the feisty woman, who was scowling.

"You bloody hypocrite"

"I always chew gum afterwards"

"I smoke menthol. So I smell less than you"

"Still stinks" I mumbled.

Kate grumbled something that sounded a lot like 'arsehole' and went to make us both some coffee. I turned back to my sketchbook.

After a minute or so, Kate became suspiciously silent. I looked around to see what she was doing, only to find her peering over my shoulder.

"What are you doing?" I asked.

"Watching you draw. You're very talented"

"I've had a lot of time to practice"

Before I could react, Kate pulled the sketchbook from under my arm and began to flip through it.

"Oi!" I tried to grab it back, but she kept moving it out of my reach.

I eventually gave up, resigning myself to lean on the counter as Kate happily flipped through the book. Her smile faded after she turned a page, bringing it closer to her face so she could observe the drawing more. I knew immediately what page it was.

"Who's this?" She asked, turning the book around to show me the sketches, not that I needed to see them to know who it was. He had haunted my dreams, my every thought, since he left. I cleared the lump that came to my throat with a cough and looked down at the counter.

"Arthur" The name felt foreign to me as I spoke; I hadn't said his name aloud in years.

"He's gorgeous"

"He was my…boss" I quickly lied, almost telling her the truth. I wanted to stay acquainted with Kate, she was my only connection to people and I didn't want her thinking of me as a freak.

"Was he nice?"

I huffed a laugh, "No", smiling at her shocked expression, "He was a terrible boss. And a huge prat"

"Then why didn't you leave your job?"

I shifted to look at her, a sad smile on my face, "He was my best friend…he was my…" I couldn't finish the sentence, but Kate knew nevertheless.

"He was your soul mate"

I nodded, going back to staring at the counter.

"Did you love him?" A soft voice asked me. Soul mates didn't have to be in love, but could be friends or even enemies. In my case, however, I couldn't lie.

"Yes" I breathed, because I did, I loved him, no matter how much of an ass he was, I couldn never hate him. "But nothing came of it" I thought aloud, "He married someone else. I don't think he even knew we were soul mates, he never felt it"

I felt a hand wrap around my shoulders and pat my arm, looking sideways I saw Kate giving me a sympathetic look.

"I'm sorry"

"It's okay"

"No, it's not" Kate smiled at the reference to our earlier conversation.

I smiled too, only slightly. Maybe I could consider Kate as a friend, just for the time being give into having a companion. After all, I thought, why am I holding myself back? He's never coming back, I need to start enjoying my eternal life.

"I want to go out tonight. Meet your friends"

Kate's surprised expression almost made me crack up laughing.

"R-Really?"

"Yeah. I'm done with being sad"

Her shock turned into a wide smile.

"Okay!" She said excitedly, bouncing on her feet. I rolled my eyes but laughed nonetheless. "I'll give them a call and tell them to meet us at The Old Tavern at half 7, that good for you?"

"Sure" I got off work in an hour, so had time for some down time before actually socialising. I was excited, I hadn't done things like this in years. Not since I realised trying to get close to people was useless. All I did was watch them grow old and fulfil their life before the inevitable happened. But, maybe, this time, I didn't have to get so close to them, only keep Kate and her friends on the border of acquaintances/friends. This could work.

Realizing Merlin had drifted off into thought again, Kate rushed into the back room to get her phone and dialled her friend's number. It rang twice before someone answered.

"The Old Tavern. Tonight. 7:30. Meet up"

"_Cool, I'll tell the others_."

"What about A-"

"_He won't come_"

"Yes he will."

"_I seriously doubt it, Kate, you know what he's like_"

"You know that guy Merlin I work with? The one I want to introduce you guys to?"

"_Yeah…?"_

"He's his soul mate"


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey Ya'll. **

**So. I have finally decided to proceed with this story after all of your lovely comments. **

**I did have a dilemma. I don't know how many people picked up on the fact that Kate was meant to be a reincarnation of Morgana. I used the name Kate as a vague reference to Katie McGrath (Morgana's actress in the series) and had to change her name to keep Merlin from remembering. Originally, I was going to change the names of all the canon reincarnations but was scared it might get really confusing, and writing this chapter it even confused me, so I just thought I'd leave a little Author's Note saying:**

**While the canon characters have their canon names (Excluding Morgana (Kate) and Leon (Rupert)), they do not remember their past lives. I may play around with this idea of them remembering but at the moment this second chapter is, again, an experiment. Thanks for taking the time to read this ^.^**

**Disclaimer: Merlin and respective characters belong to the BBC.**

I had just gotten out of the shower when the phone rang. Wrapping a towel around my waist, I almost slipped trying to get to it in time. Kate had made me learn the difference between the green and the red buttons on the screen, as I couldn't distinguish between them. I grabbed my phone just as it stopped beeping. Typical. Perching on the side of my bed, I unlocked the thing to see who had called.

Speak of the devil, it was my sister. Deciding to call her back, she picked up before the phone rang twice.

"_You're coming out tonight."_

I groaned, "But, I don't want to" I whined, knowing full well I sounded like a 5 year old.

"_I'm not giving you an option"_ Came the equally stubborn voice down the phone. I sighed.

"Why is tonight more important than last Friday?"

"_Just because."_

Sighing once more, I stood and began to dress, my phone resting between my ear and my shoulder. "You're really not going to let this go, are you?"

"_Nope"_

"Fine. Text me the details."

"_I'm coming to yours once my shift ends, I'll tell you then" _And with that, Kate hung up.

I placed my phone down and finished dressing, before deciding to put the kettle on for some tea. I was confused. I had no idea why Kate was so adamant that I come out with everyone, but knowing my sister, I was going to keep my questions to myself. That is what I usually do.

Sliding onto a breakfast bar stool as I waited for the kettle to boil, I let my mind run free.

I had been born into a world of black and white. And until I learned to talk and understand the English Language I thought it was normal. My parents took me to the doctors. I had numerous tests, but all came back with the same conclusion: _My Soul Mate had already left me._

While normal children learn about Soul Mates when they do Sex Education at School, myself and Kate were taught from the age of four. The doctors couldn't quite understand my situation, as you normally have to meet your Soul Mate for your world to turn to Greyscale when they die.

It wasn't until I became a teenager did I find out about other religions, and therefore the theory of Reincarnation. I became fascinated with the idea that I once might have had another life. It would explain why I had been reborn to see Black and White, as I had already met my Soul Mate in a past life.

I began to do vigorous research about the subject, trying as hard as I could to find an account of the same situation happening to other people. There were a few people who claimed they had them, but when tested for Colour Deficiency in their eyes it came up negative.

It was then that I came to a Wall. I had no recall of my previous life, or possibly lives, and therefore had no idea where to even start researching. I began to lose hope, that was, until Kate introduced me to her friend Gwen.

It was, in the instant our eyes met, I felt a connection. My vision stayed Black and White, but I just knew I had met the dark skinned girl before, maybe even had a romantic connection to her. But, while I knew that, something was still missing. This girl wasn't my Soul Mate. After a while, we became very good friends and she started introducing me to her friendship group. Her boyfriend was a gentle man named Lance. I found I had a connection with every single one of the group, even the loud and quite obnoxious male Gwaine.

Even if I hung out with the group, I always kept to the sidelines. The connection I had with everyone was great, but the more I was around them, the more I felt something was missing. At bars, I always looked up with a light heart when I heard the door open, signalling a new customer, not exactly sure who I was looking for.

I started to become more and more introverted, declining anyone's invitation to hang out in public. I still enjoyed the company of my friends, but in the comfort of mine or their own home. There, I was able to enjoy myself rather than glancing at the door every 30 seconds.

As my head began to clear of the deep thoughts, I realised I had been sitting at the breakfast bar for a long time, and the water in the kettle had gone cold. Sighing, I heaved myself up and reboiled it, before settling down on the sofa with a cup of tea and having some down time before the evening.

I had been sitting watching some rerun of a tv show when Kate walked into the flat. She had never knocked, even when she walked in and I was, let's just say, enjoying some me time on the sofa, she never learned her lesson.

"Tea?" I asked, making my way to the kitchen once more. She nodded and perched herself on a stool, lighting a cigarette.

I scrunched my nose, "Really?"

"What?" She asked defensively, "It's not like you don't" She nodded to the partly full ashtray infront of her.

"Yes, but I, at least, open a window" I said, turning towards the counter to make two cups of tea.

"So, how was your day?" She asked nonchalantly, taking out her work bun and running her fingers through her hair.

I joined her at the bar with the mugs, sitting opposite and nicking one of her cigarettes, ignoring her complaint on the matter.

"Not bad. I managed to get some work done at home." I was working under my Father at his company, it was nice, especially because the job allowed me to work from the comfort of my own home.

"That's good. Hey, you'll be meeting a new friend tonight"

So that's why she wanted me to come. I sipped my tea, the liquid burning my tongue. "Why is it so important that I come? Is it someone's Birthday?"

Kate shrugged, "No, but I just think that you and Merlin will get along really well"

My mind stopped short. Merlin. Merlin...That name caused a spark in me that I had never felt before. I recognised it, not just from the Arthurian Legends, but personally.

"Merlin..." I muttered, trying the name out on my tongue. It felt...right, for lack of a better word. I didn't miss Kate's knowing smile behind her mug.

"Yeah, weird name, isn't it?"

I shrugged, "I like it" I admitted, making Kate's smile widen.

"I knew you would. He's a bit like you, actually, a bit shy in public, prefers to be on his own. But I think that introducing you two would be a good idea."

"What does he look like?" I couldn't help but ask.

That smile turned into a smirk, "You'll just have to see when you meet him tonight"

Kate had made me change into a smart shirt before we left, for some weird reason. It left me complaining in the taxi over to the Pub.

"Why do I have to dress up? You're not"

"I know"

"Then why do I have to dress up?"

"Because you look more handsome like this"

I bit my tongue. It was useless arguing with Kate, having grown up with a headstrong little sister, I had learned that I never win, even when I am right.

I had to admit, as the taxi drew nearer to our destination, I grew nervous. My stomach had been twisting knots all day, and now was trying to make a bow out of it. I felt a hand on my knee and looked sideways to see Kate giving me a reassuring smile. I nodded as the cab stopped.

We paid and exited the vehicle. I looked up at the pub. It was our regular hang out, but for some reason I was very indecisive about entering.

"Come on, Arthur, it'll be fine. I just got a text from Merlin. Here's already here, the others are too and he's waiting to be introduced. He's so sweet, bless him" Kate said, her eyes on her phone. "Come on" She said, tucking her phone away into her jean pocket before grabbing me and dragging me into the pub.

The first thing my eyes were drawn to were my group of friends laughing and chatting in their usual booth, and I happily joined them as Kate made her way to the bar. I stayed standing, and my eyes were pulled to a mop of dark hair sitting at the bar.

I watched, the group now forgotten, as Kate reached the man, who turned to greet her with a small smile.

I gasped aloud. That face. His face. I knew it. I knew everything about his face, from his high cheekbones to his blue eyes. I had never seen colour, but I knew they were blue. My breathing picked up as Kate pointed in my direction and those eyes followed. He seemed to freeze, as did I.

Blue. His eyes were blue. I could see the colour, that beautiful colour that I didn't know I had missed, but I had.

Everything else seemed to stand still until it was just me and him. I swallowed the lump that had come to my throat and slowly began to move towards him. Towards Merlin. The same thing must have taken affect with him, as he started doing the same until we were feet apart.

I couldn't speak, for I didn't know what to say. What could I say? I didn't remember my past life, but I remembered him. And by the blue of his eyes, I knew, as the colour began to slowly spread around me, that he was the one.

After what felt like hours, I brought up the courage to speak. "Your eyes are blue." I whispered, and didn't realise Merlin had been crying until his eyes welled up and escaped like rain down his cheeks.

Merlin made a noise, half way between and sob and a laugh and launched himself at me. Long arms wound around my neck and he buried his head in my neck. I found my arms resting around his waist and lowered my head to his shoulder. The moment I breathed in his scent I froze again. It was so familiar I felt like I had been around him for years. My arms began to clutch tighter to him as he practically clung to me like a lifeline, and we just stayed there.

"Arthur" Came a muffled sob from the other and I opened my eyes to see I wasn't in the pub anymore.

I was lying on my back, a body as my support, as that voice repeated my name over and over again. I was in pain, and didn't know where I was, but Merlin was there, looking down at me with a broken hearted expression.

"Just...Just...Hold me" I could hear myself saying and when I moved I knew I was dying. I felt no fear, but sadness. Not because of my Queen, Guinevere , or my Knights, but because of the man who held me. The man I had met as a boy and watched him mature and grow. The man that had laid his life down for me more times than I could count. The man that was the other half of me.

The wetness on my cheeks told me that I had started crying too, and I clung to the Merlin in my arms. "I missed you" I whispered in reply, because I had, I may not have remembered until now but I had missed Merlin with every fibre of my being.

Merlin moved then. He pulled away from my neck, keeping his hold on my shirt, as if I would fade away if he let go and frowned up at me, tears in his eyes.

"You remember?" His voice was hoarse, but filled with emotion. I nodded.

"Not until now, and not everything. I remember bits and pieces, but I remember you."

The crooked smile I got in return was enough to make me grin. We stared into each others eyes before something only just dawned on me.

"Holy shit, I can see Colour!"

Merlin laughed, "So can I. It's been a while"

"Your eyes are so blue"

"As are yours"

A loud cough broke our little bubble and were turned in unison to see everyone staring at us. Kate, who I remembered to be my sister before, had a smirk on her face.

I cleared my throat, "Hi guys". I looked at everyone in turn, and recognised their faces as my loved ones. It made me the happiest I had ever been in this life.

"What's going on here?" Gwaine was the first to speak up, obviously thinking of something obnoxious and most likely inappropriate to say.

"It's a Soul Mate thing. You wouldn't understand"

Merlin's comment made everyone laugh and focus their attention on an ashamed Gwaine who had just been put in his place, but I turned to Merlin.

"We have a lot to talk about"

He nodded, finally taking his hands off my shirt, "Yes, we do"

I chewed my lip for a moment before taking his hand, making his eyes turn to me rather than the floor. "Why don't we enjoy ourselves tonight. The others may not remember as much as we do, but it will be nice to be all together."

Merlin looked nervous all of a sudden, "I don't know..." he looked over at the group, who had thankfully decided to give us some privacy and were chatting amongst themselves again.

"Oh, don't be such a girl, Merlin" The response came out of my mouth before I could think and Merlin's expression turned to one of surprise, then laughter.

"Okay, clotpole, but we will talk tomorrow about everything" He said, leaving me as he walked towards the booth.

"But that's not even a word!"


End file.
